December 12, 2023
HE PUT UP WITH HER FOR A WHOLE YEAR? Anniversary Celebrations!
December 11, 2023 marked the one year anniversary of Bonk House resident Ms. Kriofsky and Bonk House regular Sir Andrew’s relationship. Sir Andrew greeted Ms. Kriofsky at the Bonk House with a dozen roses, before continuing the celebration at an Uptown favorite, Martina.
On the menu at Martina was grilled beef tongue bruschetta, pappardelle with short rib ragu, and Norwegian salmon. While this lavish meal did not disappoint, Ms. Kriofsky was alarmed by the beef tongue bruschetta, stating, “I didn’t think it would be so…tongue shaped.” Through her masterful efforts of disassociation, the appetizer transformed from beef tongue to mmm meat and bread.
During the meal, the couple toasted to what will hopefully be many more years of blissful happiness.
OLD HABITS DIE HARD
This week saw an unfortunate resurgence of behavior from Ms. Kriofsky on a scale that hasn’t been seen since ye olden Grandmarc days. On Saturday Ms. Kriofsky threw out her back once again and found herself unable to sit, stand, walk, or lay down comfortably, and thus, she informed Ms. Star that she would be unable to attend a previously scheduled commitment that evening.
Around 3pm, Sir Andrew tucked Ms. Kriofsky in for a cozy nap to hopefully heal her back. Ms. Kriofsky then slept for the next 15 hours straight.
Many had hoped that these habits of flaking followed by excessive sleep had died out several years ago upon Ms. Kriofsky’s switch off of Lexapro, but scientists suggest perhaps Ms. Kriofsky is simply a weak-willed woman.
EPIC PRANK: BEN BAMBOOZLED
Friends of the Bonk House, Ms. Star and Ms. Faith hosted a thoroughly superb surprise Wigmas for Mr. Ben, who was caught entirely off guard by the festivities, despite them being held in his home.
Ms. Faith expertly coordinated the trickery, asking Ms. Kriofsky to remove Mr. Ben from the premises for several hours so that the apartment could be prepared for Wigmas.
Upon re-entering the apartment, Mr. Ben displayed a classic Bonk Face of Surprise and Joy (pictured right), which was mostly all the validation the hosts needed.
CHRISTMAS CROCHET UPDATE:
Ms. Kriofsky continues to toil away on Christmas crochet projects, with a total of a dozen projects on the docket. Our last report of November 28, 2023, listed one project as completed, three in progress, and eight left untouched,
The leaderboard currently stands at two projects completed, three in progress, and seven yet to be started. Her deadlines creep ever closer, with Christmas festivities scheduled for December 22 and 29, as well as January 6, 2024.
thoughts? feelings? worries?